Kevin's Optimum Alcohol Level

What this says:

• I'm depressed when I'm sober.
• It really only takes me one drink to break out of my shell. After three, I'll tell you anything, talk to you about anything.
• Even though my tolerance is above and beyond 6 or 7, my optimum level is really only two. After that I'm just horny and obscene.
• Yes, every drink makes me hornier. And yes, after about 6 or 7, your senses are so dulled that really it wouldn't be worthwhile.
• I should probably be a little more careful next time I'm "graphing" at work. I bet my boss would love to know what I was drawing when he came up behind me and I conspicuously flipped the post-it pad over...
• Oh, and it also says that my writing has gotten worse since kindergarten. How proud am I.